Every keen baker knows that looking after a sourdough starter is more complicated, more time-consuming and more frustrating than looking after a child.
Sourdough starters are unpredictable, capricious, disappointing and – occasionally – utterly inspiring. They dominate your thoughts, your waking hours, and your concentration.
In this way, they perfectly resemble the act of rearing children.
So, to get the nation eating sourdough bread, we need a Sourdough Starter Benefit, in line with Child Benefit. Everyone who can demonstrate the birth and existence of their sourdough starter to the satisfaction of the authorities – name (Thunder), date of birth (17-8-2009), parentage (may be the offspring of 2 sourdough mammies or daddies) – will receive a monthly stipend of €130 for the upkeep and maintenance of their sourdough stater, until age 16.
Bakers should log into www.welfare.ie, and complete the new Sourdough Starter Benefit Form SW-43 (Child Benefit is Form SW-42).
The birth details of all Sourdough Starters born in the Republic of Ireland will be stored in a central database. Sourdough Starter Benefit Section is part of the Department of Social Protection, and details of all Starters may be shared, especially those that contain heirloom grains.
The Sourdough Starter Allowance
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